Help! Someone’s Dying!

urbanempathyIf empathy is so wonderful, why does it get so obnoxious? Why do empaths feel the need to get so hysterical about someone else’s problems? OK. If someone has a problem and asks for help, it’s perfectly fine to help them, if one wants to. But I’m talking about cases where the one with the “problem” has not asked for help. The failure to ask for help is what really seems to upset these empaths who want to make other people’s problems their own. At the same time, these same empaths get all pushed out of shape when the person with the problem get a following and exerts an influence on others, usually people younger than themselves. There’s something about age differences that brings out a really annoying feature in many people. The older one thinks s/he has a parental right, nay, responsibility to boss the younger one around. This is especially obnoxious and absurd when the age difference is only by a couple of years. When the older person doesn’t get all bossy, s/he’s accused of being a bad influence. Can’t we take our hands out of each other’s wounds, folks? Please?

I recently stumbled upon a group of You-Tube videos about someone named Eugenia Cooney. This person is a model and You-Tuber. She is also anorexic.  But she doesn’t admit it. She claims to be a normal, naturally thin woman. She has many fans who have been agonizing about what appears to be her imminent death.  The video below,

made by a former anorectic, explains what is really going on in the mind of Eugenia and how clueless these fans are. But it seems retarded to me to see these folks self-righteously demanding that “we” do something about what seems to be a slow suicide. By “we,” is that Onision and me? Yes, Onision is one of the ones who likes to shame himself and everyone else with guilt. It seems “we” have failed Eugenia Cooney by not somehow saving her.

onisionAmidst all the confusion and finger-pointing, one You-Tuber has shown actual insight. A chick at Of Herbs and Altars  shows amazing wisdom. But even she can’t help moralizing. In her case, she guilt-trips, not the fans as much as Eugenia, herself, on the ground that she is a bad influence on the kiddies. Oh, brother! This again? If we are to have free speech on the internet, we can’t let our fear of being a bad influence on kids censor us. People need to think for themselves. I have no sympathy for people who won’t take responsibility for their own ideas. They get what they deserve.

The world of empathy-worship insists on moral involvements between people that goes 'What kind of crazy nonsense is that? It sounds like you've been listening to your inner adult again!'far beyond simply treating each other in an ethical manner. We are somehow responsible for a self-destructive celebrity. The celebrity, herself, is responsible for her effect on her fans. Why can’t everyone be responsible for hirself? If someone is too young to think for hirself, let hir parent or guardian monitor what s/he can see on the internet. Personally, I thought for myself from the earliest age.

I am sick of those who want to save us from ourselves. I’ve done self-destructive things. I knew they were self-destructive and I didn’t want anyone trying to stop me. They are not responsible for my choices and I don’t hold myself responsible for their choices.


Eugenia Cooney is certainly freaky looking with her extreme emaciation. I can understand “fans” watching her just waiting for her to die. Our interest in each other is not always benevolent. In fact, entertainment in general often focusses on the darker side of life. Most people find the spectacle of people killing each other more fun and interesting than watching peace and tranquility.

Marilyn Manson’s song, Mister Superstar from the Antichrist Superstar album alludes to the desire of fans to consume and destroy their idols. It contains a whisper in the mix slyly suggesting to the superstar “Why don’t you kill yourself on TV. I wanna see you die.” While the TV sitcom, One Day at a Time was playing and MacKenzie Phillips was heavily using cocaine, fans watched the show just to see her gradual deterioration. The lack of empathy is really refreshing.

5 thoughts on “Help! Someone’s Dying!

  1. Haha I love this. I’ve seen a lot of these videos. I’ll tell ya, Youtube runs on drama. If it wasn’t for drama within each community, there would be no youtube. Many if not most youtubers make these drama videos just to get more views because guess what. The audience thrives on drama too.

    You should check out the infighting among vegans and the fights/response videos between the carnivores and vegans. It’s crazy. Now I can understand the carnivores getting angry because vegans are so militant and they seem to want to ban and outlaw meat, make all men have vasectomies and control everyone’s diet.

    When I first started reading your post though, about asking for help, my first thought was in my own primary relationship. The dude is passive aggressive and never asks for help even when it’s obvious he needs it. For example he’ll carry too much shit down the steps just to make it in one trip and not ask me to carry a box or two.

    Anyone else I wouldn’t care. Go ahead and learn that you can hurt yourself by doing too much. But with him it’s irritating, because if he trips and falls, that does indeed effect my life.

    I’ll be the one driving him to the er. I’ll be the one nursing him back to working order. I’ll be the one who will have to do everything around here while he heals.

    So in some aspects of life I can see why a person not asking for help would be annoying and even infuriating.

    But yeah, the example you give here, I’m in complete agreement. If Eugenia wasn’t on youtube, no one would even know that she’s killing herself.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. When helping your passive-aggressive man, there are ways to make it less gratifying for him. Manage not to hear his calls for room service. Bring his meals with fewer frills. “Forget” the salt and pepper.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Lol…Yeah, I’m learning. Those are good ones. But it’s not the most fitting for the situation right now. I cook, but he serves himself.

        A lot of it is also in the form of remarks that push my buttons. I want to stop reacting because it stresses my body out so much. Once I can stop reacting, the set backs won’t be so bad and I can get some momentum going toward the goal of moving out and away from him.

        I’m open to any suggestions, like mental tricks to stop reacting with so much anger.

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